RIGHTS AND RESTRAINT

Nothing makes me feel more violent than driving in Mumbai. I may try to meditate and be calm, serene beforehand, but put me behind the wheel and it all evaporates. I believe that the Mumbai traffic could provoke even the most non-violent people into turning psychotic! Lane-cutting at the last minute, turning left from the right-most lane, going the wrong way on a one-way road…one might expect this sort of behaviour from taxi drivers since they seldom have formal driving lessons & are limited by outdated cars without the grace of power-steering. But what is the justification of the men & women who are presumably more privileged – did they take driving lessons from a taxi driver?

My latest discovery is that stopping at a red light is suddenly out of fashion. And I’m not talking about Sundays or late nights when laziness or sleep-deprivation overwhelms reasonable action but even at rush hour on weekdays! When did this become acceptable? We may be infamous for our disregard for our own lives but when did we become so supremely indifferent to the safety of others? And since when did it become acceptable to berate with much shouting & honking the rare driver who does stop at a red light?

Yes, I know that living in a democracy gives us certain rights. It may be a long time since my last Civics exam but I’m pretty sure that the right to endanger ourselves and others is not one of them! My question then is – shouldn’t ‘restraint’ be as important as ‘rights’? They are two sides of the same coin. If I don’t show restraint, I cannot respect the rights of others. My rights cannot be respected without the exercise of restraint by the people who would violate them. It seems strange that in a place where we are so cognizant of our rights, few of us ever choose to exercise restraint!

The road is not the only place where another’s right of way is abused.

We seem fundamentally incapable of respecting order in queues. So many strategies to replace the patience we have never developed. There’s the ‘innocent’ who acts surprised when accused of infiltration – ‘is there a queue?’ There’s the ‘heavyweight’ who relies on intimidation by size, elbowing lesser mortals out of the way. The ‘sneak’ who slips in when someone else’s attention wanders. The ‘fool’ who acts so stupid that it seems easier to let him get away with it than have to explain his wrongdoing to him.

Most absurd of all is the rush to get out of an airplane when it lands. Is there a fire or is it collective claustrophobia that prompts the mad dash? Getting out first doesn’t ensure anything – you still have to rush to be first on and then off the terminal bus. And how can you be sure that you’ll be the first out of the airport? The first in and out of the restroom? How can you be the first to collect your luggage, which everyone knows is in the hands of providence!

I’m reminded so often of George Orwell’s ‘Animal Farm’ – all animals are equal but some are more equal. By pretending life is an F1 race where one winner takes it all, how does lack of restraint make us the first among equals?

Think of all the great people who command your respect and then think of all the pretenders whom you can’t stand. What separates the two? What are the qualities of the genuinely great that cannot be faked? Is it the sense of entitlement that comes from knowing one’s own rights or the exercise of restraint from infringing on the rights of others?

Which will you emulate? Will you stop at the red light or will you honk at the person who does?