YOUR JOB OR YOUR LIFE

Someone recently told me that a job is just a job – “it shouldn’t infringe on your life.” I have heard this or versions of this statement many times over. It is usually said by the kind of people who have their lives in perfect balance (i.e. have ‘made it’ to wherever ‘it’ is) or older people reminiscing about an earlier strictly 9 to 5 world or people who have never officially worked a day in their lives.

Regardless of who says it, being the recipient of this statement usually leaves me disoriented for considerable time. Why? Well, it’s because my response usually is, “what life?”

Yes, it’s true!

When I first started working I did have other interests. I knew what the latest music was, was aware of current events and had opinions on the latest movies, books, exhibitions, plays, etc. Yet, I was convinced that to advance my career, I had to ‘sacrifice’. I heard stories from senior colleagues about nights & weekends spent in the office which somehow had me convinced that whenever the situation arose, I would have to man up and do the job.

And my friends didn’t seem to have it any different. At least, when I worked late I actually had work to do. My friends had stories of having to stay in office without work just so they wouldn’t be seen to leave before the boss. What’s more, they sometimes went to work on weekends only to show their faces, thus displaying their strong commitment to the company.

Whenever we managed to meet, we all griped about this. This is not the way to live. We should put our foot down. As long as the work gets done, we should not have to give up our evening’s entertainment or night’s sleep. We would resolve to change this but when we went back to work, we never quite got up the courage. What if they fire me? There are plenty of people willing to work like this – they’ll get ahead and I’ll be left behind!

A few years later and I’m beginning to wonder if this was true or was I participating in some kind of mass self-delusion? The truth is that when something is pressing, we always manage to make time for it. Our jobs seem so important to us that they are given priority over all the other things we claim to care much more deeply for – our families, our friends and our passions. Is this really what some unspoken corporate morality is forcing us to do or is it a rationalization for those of us who define ourselves more by our jobs than any by any other parameter?

Think about it. When we meet new people, we no longer first ask ‘where are you from?’ Instead, our first question is ‘what do you do?’ It’s as if we believe that the choice (or compulsion) of a job is the best indicator of who the person is. And this is the same standard we are applying to ourselves.

While I ponder this, I also feel that it seems to be too late to get a life. If I have the energy to do anything once I leave the office, I’m not aware of it! If I get a weekend off, I only want to catch up on my sleep deficit. Even a movie seems like a perfect waste of 3 good hours. And as for writing this blog – it feels like therapy and it might just help me get a little bit better at my job ;)